As I was saying to my squeaky dryer the other day (what—you think he does all the talking?), “What’s up with delivery services these days?” I was referring to Fed-Ex, UPS, and any others that have given up on customer service.
It wasn’t that long ago you had to sign for a package. Almost overnight, they began dropping them on your doorstep without so much as a knock.
I admit, I was venting to my dryer (oh–get it? venting) because who else am I gonna complain to? These days, fat cat Midge is in hiding most of the time. Infrequently, I hear an odd noise under my bed. It always takes a few seconds to realize she’s snoring. Now, tell me that’s not strange to have snoring emanating from beneath my bed. What has my life come to?
Anyway, I started out harping about bad deliveries but I had a funny story to tell and I knew my squeaky dryer would appreciate a good laugh.
“Last week I ordered a book called The Emotionally Absent Mother,” I confided. “Of course, once it was ordered I forgot all about it. So this morning I walked into my room to see Alexa lighting up with a notification. I asked what it was and she said, ‘The Emotionally Absent Mother has been delivered.’
“Without missing a beat I said, “Well whatever you do, don’t let her in!”
Oh how we laughed and laughed!
(We’re easily amused around here.)